Lest anyone think I've got this thing all figured out, I don't. If I have somehow made anyone think that this journey is easy, it isn't. And if you think I've got it all together to win this battle, remember it's a day-by-day struggle, sometimes minute by minute.
I woke up this morning ill – not sick, not feeling bad – just ill. To be honest, I'm tired of having to make all the decisions. I'm tired of having to take care of everyone else, and feeling like there's no one looking after me. Irrational, stupid feelings, I know. But they are mine. I feel that way this morning, and I promised I would be honest throughout my journey.
So, for breakfast? Scrambled eggs, hash browns and a half of a doughnut. You know what? Food did NOT MAKE ME FEEL ANY BETTER!!!!
Even though I told myself that I deserved to have what I wanted, that I didn't always have to sacrifice, I still didn't feel any better after I fed my emotions. Because I can't stuff my emotions away with food.
So today, I've got some mental stuff to work through. I'll be back.
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